Learning a hobby better the second time around

Returning to a relatively new hobby became a study in a personal dichotomy that has trailed me for my adult life and probably earlier. I admire some Type A personality characteristics, such as being driven, hardworking, multitasking and wanting to succeed. That's why I'll put in long hours to finish a work project at 11 p.m. or midnight, even if it means I have to cancel meeting up with friends or postpone watching my favorite TV series that night. But I don't like the extra stress that comes along with Type A personality characteristics, such as being impatient when the Internet goes down during research or getting annoyed with unreturned calls on deadline days. I'm sure that's why I'm often not able to fall asleep by 1 a.m. or, worse yet, why I wake up at 3 a.m. to text myself a story idea. My dentist told me two years ago that I grind my teeth at night and that's probably a defense to placing too much of a priority on finishing my daily objectives. In fact, he gave me a night guard to protect my teeth from attacking each other, which was a wakeup call to mitigate my stress. Since recognizing why I need a nightguard, I'm finally succeeding in my determination to lose some Type A personality characteristics. I'm learning it's OK to emulate Type B personality characteristics such as being more laidback and relaxed. I see that now through my return this month to clogging classes after an almost three-year hiatus. When I first started clogging in 2018, I gave myself a two-year deadline to learn as much as possible in my new endeavor so I could enter competitions and perform in clogging groups. Looking back, it was an overzealous and silly goal to make. But I loved clogging and made myself practice at least an hour a day watching YouTube clogging dances over and over until I could at least fake the routines. When I began class again this month, however, I hadn't practiced clogging with the YouTube performances for almost two years. My clogging shoes remained untouched for two years and I wondered if I would embarrass myself in class. During my first class this month, I noticed that the dancer who was always great is now performing in the Sacramento area's best clogging group, the Aftershock Cloggers. I also noticed my friend, who took up clogging after me three years ago, is now dancing circles around me. But that's OK. My competitive clogging streak has vanished; I just want to have fun, like Cyndi Lauper who sang the classic "Girls Just Want To Have Fun." Now I don't care about climbing to the top of the class; I just want to hear my shoes tapping on the floor. This time around, Saturday practices are offered. Now I have an extra hour to work on my steps. Just as in other skills, I have to put in the time if I want to get better. The more I practice, the more the dances will be easier to follow. And that's exactly what happened this Saturday at my second practice. I relearned a few steps at Saturday's practice the right way, instead of putting my own spin on them. Learning the right way to do the steps at practice Saturday gave me a greater sense of accomplishment than in making up my own variations to steps I before could not master. Come to think of it, going over the steps several times Saturday taught me about patience and that it's a nice skill to cultivate. Maybe I'll pick up more Type B personality characteristics the more I clog.