Trainer Billy Blanks is a big, fat liar

So Roseville is the skinniest city in the nation. It's great news, and just that much more ammunition we can use to promote this area as pretty darn good.But there's one small problem with the results released from Money Magazine's upcoming "Best Places to Live" edition: Obviously, no one consulted me when they were compiling these statistics.I'm a "big ol' girl." There's no hiding it (there aren't enough muumuus in Hawaii) and there's no sugar coating it. I will never be a cover model, unless someone decides to publish "Heavy Hitters of the Media," with the emphasis on "heavy."I've never been able to wear small sizes - at my best, I was wearing size 12 - and every time I hear a woman who is a size 2 complaining that she has gained soooooo much weight, or that an outfit "makes me look fat," I just want to shove a dozen Krispy Kremes down her throat to shut her up.Part of my appearance is genetics, but I will admit part is my lifestyle. I can't seem to make it through the workday without at least two or more cans of soda, and I never seem to be able to find time to hit the gym.But it's not that I haven't tried to make an effort to better my appearance and my health. Though I can't seem to fit a trip to the fitness center into my schedule, I decided I would do things in the comfort and safety of my own home. For my birthday this year, I convinced my fiancé I would not belt him in the gut if he got me the DVD I really wanted: Billy Blanks' "Tae Bo Cardio for Body and Mind."So when I opened my gift, I got out my workout clothes, popped in the DVD and was ready to go. I even made sure to stretch first so I didn't hurt myself, and I had plenty of water and a towel nearby to mop the sweat from my brow as I punched and turned and kicked my way through my workout.Within 15 minutes, though, there was a definite change in my mood. Billy Blanks was really getting on my nerves.As I listened to his co-trainer - a skinny blonde, I might note - count down the remaining "reps" for each exercise, I noticed things weren't matching. Billy would tell the viewers, "C'mon, just one more set!" as the perky blonde counted backward from eight. But when she got close to the end, Billy would call out, "C'mon, just one more!"Excuse me? You told me "just one more" one rep ago.Then the moment of realization came: Billy Blanks is a big, fat liar.But I was determined. I finished the workout. I even forced myself in the next few weeks to continue to work out, making sure I was stretched, hydrated and outfitted. But during each session with Billy, my intense hatred of the lying scoundrel grew. "One more set" my foot.Needless to say, "Tae Bo Cardio for Body and Mind" wasn't the right fit for me and my quest to shed some pounds and join the rest of Roseville's "skinny people."But that disc sure does make a great coaster for my soda can.- Sherri L. Shaulis is the editor of The Press-Tribune. She can be reached at pteditor@goldcountrymedia.com.